AMERICAN RAMAYANA
RAMAYANA  as Described by an AMERICAN Dude   
So, like this dude had, like, a big cool kingdom and people liked

him. But, like, his step-mom, or something, was kindofa pain and she

forced her husband to, like, send this cool-dude, he was Ram, to

some national forest or something...since he was going, for like,

something like more than 10 years or so..he decided to get his wife

and his bro along..you know...so that they could all chill out

together. But DUDE, the forest was reeeeaaaall scary shit..really

man..they had monkeys and devils and shit like that. But this dude,

Ram, kicked ass with darts and bows and arrows...so it was fine. But

then some bad gangsta boys, some jerk called Ravan, picks up his

babe (sita) and lures her away to his hood. ANd boy, was our man,

and also his bro, Lakshman, pissed..And you DON't piss this

son-of-a-gun cuz, he just kicks ass and like, all the gods were with

him.. So anyways, you don't mess with gods.

SO, Ram, and his bro get an army of monkeys..dude, don't ask me how

they trained the damn monkeys..just go along with me, ok..so, Ram,

Laksh. and their monkeys whip this gangsta's ass in his own hood.

Anyways, by this time, their time's up in the forest...and

anyways...it gets kind of boring, you know...no TV or mall or nothing

like that. So, they decided to hitch a ride back home...and when the

people realize that, like, our dude, his bro and the wife are back

home...they thought, well, you know, at least they deserve something

nice...and they didn't have any bars or clubs in those days...so

they couldn't take him out for a drink, so they, like, decided to

smoke and shit...and since they also had some lamps, they lit the

lamps also...so it was priitttty cool...you know with all those

fireworks..really, they even had some local musicians play along

with the fireworks.. and you know, what, dude, that was the very

first, I kid you not, that was the very first music-synkronized

fireworks...you know, like the 4th of July stuff, but just, more

cooler and stuff, you know. And, so dude, that's whats is ramayan!!

The End  

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